Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Pride before the fall

Its been a while.  Yep.....  a long while.  Life has been so full lately that I haven't had the "heart" to blog.  I feel like I have nothing to say, without sounding forlorn, and I don't want to do that.

God has been good to us.  He really has.  When we get into our house it will be awesome, and I know this.  We are getting a rockin' deal; space to spread ourselves a bit.  This two or three month trial will make it all the more worth it, I know this.  Just as I know this has to be what God wants.  I am giving Him the glory.  It has been a trial and I haven't always been cheerful and full of patience.  We all know patience is not my strong suit anyway.  I am trying, but fail.  Please Brother Randy; please know that I am trying hard to be full of faith.  I am.  I am trying very hard to wait upon the Lord in all things.  I am not without hope, God is my hope....  I just really, really wish He worked in my timing! 

So I struggle with this aspect of my Christian walk.  I struggle with waiting for God to work.  The minute I think I have learned and I am doing ok, God says "let's see if you really are at a place where you can pat yourself on the back...." 

Wake up call time....  I have not arrived yet, so I can get off my high horse or be bucked off.  I am still a struggling sinner.
My heart is tired.  I am weary.  I am tired of waiting, and this is my problem.  I lack patience and this is my greatest fault.  I lack patience to wait upon God and to wait for Him to work.  I am tired and unable to do this, and am now where I have no where else to turn but to the embrace of God, but its hard to humble myself.  I am in need of the prayers of other Christians.   I have too much pride, and God is trying to teach me that my pride will keep getting in my way until I turn it over to Him.   

Thank you for hanging with me. 


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