November and December have proven to be full of stuff and adding on some "goals" that I felt I need to do was just .... well frankly, was too much. Some days it was all I could do to get my own 5 must do things done. Does anyone else every just feel, well, OVERWHELMED? Have you ever felt like you have a cup that someone just refuses to stop pouring "stuff" into??? That has been what the last two or more months has felt like to me. Total overwhelm city. Much to my despair it leaked over into the lives of those I love most. Despite my best efforts, despite me explaining the best I could, people kept pouring it into my cup. Like they expected it should magically grow....... I explained to one person and she even expressed understanding, only to later become angry when I reminded her that I said I could not do XYZ. She felt (and feels???) I was shirking my duties toward her..... anyhows......It became where even small things could send my day into a tail spin. Today, is the last big commitment I have made for the next month. I am not making any "real goals" by most people standards. I can only get done what I can and those 3 added "goals" have been too much for my life lately.
Yes, despite my best efforts, despite me saying no, no more, nada.... some people just pour away. Even when you jerk your cup away, they chase you and pour every chance they get.... I can only do what I can do. I think this is an epidemic. Everyone I see lacks joy, or so it seems, during a joyous time of year. Have we become such a stressed out society that even this season has lost its joy? We are in a sad state indeed. Why is this? Why do we have a need to fill up every waking moment, and if we don't others feel a compulsion to try to fill it for us? Thoughts???? I have been on a quest of simplification, I am trying but it seems I hit road blocks. I have made progress, but am no where near as simple as I want to be.
On to better news.... I got my Year End Christmas letter written this week. I have made 4 dozen jars of jam, washed umpteen loads of laundry, written a 38 page paper, only have a a sink and one counter top full of dishes, the living room was fairly clean until yesterday, and I am done with school until January. When I announced this to Bear, sadly she exclaimed with excitement, "so now you can play with me again?" Oh dear, has our time together melted down to non-fun time only? I guess our craft projects have not been fun to her little eyes. Our learning time has been lacking in the fun department --to this I agree. She wants a mommy that plays barbies with her and lots of board games, and colors pages with her..... I have been lacking in that department lately. In my heart I know its true.
I will be finishing up my many sewing projects next week as well as a few other Christmas presents we have planned.
Otherwise, tending my sweet garden, playing barbie dolls, and having tea parties are my goals. How are those for goals? *smile*
NEXT WEEK, don't forget our week of give aways! It should be fun for everyone!
Linking up with Our Good Life today.
Oh sweet friend, I think we have all been there! We relaxed on school this month since it was not fun for the girls, and I really want it to be fun. You can be schooling while coloring, and drawing and creating. You can do math while playing games :)
ReplyDeletepraying you can recapture that joy!